


Upstaged

by Joycee



Category: White Collar
Genre: Bisexual Male Character, Blow Jobs, Clubbing, Dancing and Singing, Drag Queens, M/M, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-01
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2019-04-30 20:43:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14505114
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joycee/pseuds/Joycee
Summary: Neal goes undercover as an entertainer in a nightclub to bust a smuggling ring.





	Upstaged

The FBI New York White Collar team was gathered in their conference room to be briefed on their latest case. Neal Caffrey strolled in just as Agent Peter Burke was about to begin their briefing on a new case.

“So nice you could join us,” Peter grumbled. “I'm going to need to you on this one.”

Neal grinned, “So do you need a handsome, charming smooth talker or do you need my keen mind and uncanny intuition?”

“How good a dancer are you?” Peter smirked.

“Hey, I can waltz, foxtrot, chacha, most ballroom dances,” Neal said modestly.

Peter chuckled, “Not that kind of dancing.”

Neal tried, “Oh, you mean more contemporary?”

“You might say that,” offered Peter. “This would involve singing, too.”

Everyone turned to look at him as Neal hesitated, “Uh, well, yeah, I guess. Peter, what is this is about?”

Peter signaled to Agent Jones to project a picture of a nightclub called Gay Times. He flashed several scenes from outside and inside the club. It was packed with young men in trendy sexy clothing, although many had their shirts off. There were men dancing in bikini briefs above the crowded dance floor.

There were a few guffaws around the table. Neal looked at Peter and surmised, “That’s a gay club.”

Peter nodded, “A very popular one. Trouble is, we believe it is a cover for a smuggling ring for stolen treasures.”

Agent Diana Berrigan asked, “What kind of treasures, Peter?”

“Well, most recently, pre-Colombian figures from South America,” Peter answered, “but similar small rare objets d’art may have passed through there on a regular basis. We believe the next ones will be Faberbe eggs.”

“How are they doing it?” asked Jones. “How do we know about this?”

Peter replied, “We received a tip from the person on your next slide. Please project it for us to see.”

An image of a man elaborately made up and dressed as a female nightclub singer appeared. Again there were some uncomfortable chuckles. Someone asked, “Is there a sound track?”

Neal had been sitting very quietly and now he asked warily, “So what is my part in this?”

Peter appeared a bit uncomfortable as he explained, “This is Michael Jensen aka Michelle Jaquard. He is a drag queen who serves as emcee and entertainer at the club. He came to us because he caught on to what the manager of the club has been doing. The manager’s name is Richard Holmes.”

“Well, can we just raid the place?” asked Diana.

“No, unfortunately, we need evidence to get a warrant,” Peter responded. “Ideally, we would catch them in the act of transferring the goods.”

Neal persisted impatiently, “So what am I supposed to be? Peter, I can’t pass as a go go boy.”

“Well,” Peter hedged, ”That is not what I had in mind. Our informant suggested that we put someone undercover as his assistant.”

“His male assistant or his female assistant?” Neal asked suspiciously.

“Male. A singing and dancing partner for Michelle,” Peter admitted. “Mike believes he can convince the manager that he needs the help to improve the show.”

Everyone looked at Neal curiously. Neal blushed and stammered, “N-no, Peter. I don’t think so. Isn’t there some other way I could get inside?”

“Not according to Michael. It probably wouldn’t take very long,” Peter argued. “Probably just a few nights.”

Peter went on to explain that Jones and Diana could pose as waiters, some of the Harvard crew could be patrons and he could represent Neal as his agent.

Neal scowled, “Peter, could I talk to you after the conference?”

“As a matter fact, I have arranged a meeting at the club with our informant,” Peter told him.

“Wonderful,” Neal sighed sarcastically, as Peter went on to describe the jeweled Russian eggs that they suspected were being smuggled.

.

They met Michael Jensen at the Gay Times club that afternoon. The place was practically deserted since the club was only open at night. There were some dancers practicing casually. A few lighting technicians were walking around.

Michael greeted them, “Hey, glad you could come, Agent Burke.”

Peter looked around and checked, “Is the manager around anywhere? Is it okay for us to talk?”

Michael assured him, “Yeah, it’s fine. Rick is not here right now, but anyway, I told him someone would be stopping by to audition as my assistant.”

Peter introduced Neal, “This is my consultant Neal Caffrey. He’s a very talented guy and is also skilled at snooping around.”

Neal looked uncomfortable. He gave a little wave and said, “Hey.”

Michael appraised Neal in his Devore suit and fedora and nodded approvingly. “I like the whole rat pack look.” He wondered, “Have you ever had any experience in show business, Neal?”

Neal responded honestly, “Not really. What little performing i’ve done has been strictly amateur.”

“Well, that’s okay,” Michael reassured. “We mostly do lip syncing anyway. You will always be on stage with me so you can follow my lead.”

Neal nodded unenthusiastically. “Maybe I can do that. You’ll have to teach me, though.”

Michael surmised, “I guess you’re straight so you don’t have a lot of experience with gay clubs.”

Neal shrugged noncommittally and Peter asked, “That’s not a problem, is it?”.

“No, so why don’t you let me show you around now and you can come back this evening to catch my show,” suggested Michael. “Tomorrow afternoon I’ll introduce you both to Rick, and my crew is eager to meet you, Neal. They’ll want to start planning your costumes and make up.”

“Uh, costumes and make up?” questioned Neal nervously.

“Nothing too elaborate. Don’t worry. Not like Michelle. She’s the star,’ Michael joked. “I could see you in a nice trim tux and top hat. Our customers will be drunk and stoned so nobody will be very critical. Just try to have fun.”

“Right,” Neal said hesitantly. He looked pointedly at Peter and agreed, “Okay then. Peter and I will be back this evening.”

Michael looked critically at them and instructed, “Okay, but don’t wear suits! Put on something tight and sexy. The club opens at 9:00 and my first show starts at 11:00.”

“Uh, what time is your second show?” Peter questioned.

Mike grinned, “1:00 and my third is at 3:00. The club closes at 5:00.”

As they left, Neal teased Peter, “Well, no early morning meetings for me for awhile!”

Peter frowned, “I wonder what we’re getting into. Do you have anything suitable to wear tonight?”

Neal gave him a look and Peter laughed, “Of course, you do. Well, I’d better consult Elizabeth to see if we can come up with something for me.”

Neal faked a yawn and told him, “I’m going to go home and take a nap. Meet you at your house at 10:00?”

“Okay. I don’t think it will be necessary for us to be there the whole time tonight,” Peter surmised. “We can just get a feel for the place.”

Neal asked skeptically, “Peter, have you ever been to a gay club?”

“Can’t say I have,” Peter admitted. “How are they different from other clubs?”

Neal laughed, “Oh, you’ll see. Be prepared to overlook a lot of casual drug use and sex, Peter.”

“Okay, I can do that, but no drugs for you,” Peter warned.

“Of course not!” Neal agreed innocently. “I’ll be too busy singing and dancing and hunting for Faberge eggs.”

.

That night, Neal appeared at the Burke residence dressed in tight shiny black slacks and a bright blue sleeveless mesh top. Peter was wearing black jeans and a tight black t shirt. Elizabeth exclaimed, “Wow! You two are really something! Where’s the camera?”

Peter winced, “Oh no, hon. I don’t think we need a picture of this. Although we may want one of Neal once he is in costume.”

Neal gave him a withering look and warned, “Don’t push it, Peter.”

Elizabeth laughed and told them, “Well, just be sure all those hot young men keep their hands off of you!”

“Not a problem,” chuckled Peter.

Neal grinned, “Speak for yourself, Peter, but you can pose as my date tonight.”

When they arrived at the club, they were surprised to see men overflowing out the door. They finally made their way inside looking away from inviting stares and removing the occasional gropes from tneir asses.

Colored lights swooped around the room and the techno music was blaring. The dance floor was writhing with half naked men. Peter suggested, “Let’s find the bar.”

When they approached the bar, Neal warned, “Peter, order beer in a bottle and keep your thumb over the top when your mouth isn’t on it.”

Peter got two beers and handed one to Neal. He worried, “Do you really think someone would drug us?”

Neal gave him a look and suggested, “Follow me. Let’s go to the back of the club.”

Peter slowly followed him as they made their way around the dancers. Again they received many interested looks and a few exploratory touches. Neal found what he was looking for, a dimly lit room separated from the rest of the club. It was full of obviously drunk and drugged men engaged in various sexual acts.

Neal roughly shoved Peter up against the wall and leaned in to murmur into Peter’s neck, “Let’s not act like tourists.”

Neal stepped back a bit and began to open Peter’s pants. Peter placed both palms on Neal’s chest and pushed him back, saying loudly, “Fuck off. I changed my mind.”

He pushed past Neal and waited for him outside. Neal gave him a grin and Peter admitted, “Okay, so a lot of stuff goes on here.”

They climbed up to a balcony and looked down on the dance floor and the stage. The room quieted as the lighting changed. Michelle appeared on stage in a fluffy pink ball gown and got the attention of the room. She told some lewd jokes and then launched into a campy version of “I Enjoy Being A Girl,” sashaying around the stage and flirting with those closest to the stage.

Neal watched with growing concern. He complained, “Peter, really, what do you expect me to do?”

Peter placated, “Hey, let’s just discuss it with Michael tomorrow afternoon and try to get more details.”

Glancing around at the fit young bodies all around them, Neal muttered, “I think I’d better put in some extra laps at the pool.”

He turned mischievously and grabbed Peter’s face and pressed a sloppy kiss on his mouth. He smirked, “When in Rome.... After all, we need to look like we fit in.”

They stayed for another show and even danced for a little while after a few beers. They couldn’t help noticing the open use of poppers and Ecstasy and other drugs and the alcohol flowed freely, too. Peter asked, “How do these guys get up and get dressed the next morning?”

Neal shrugged, “They’re young. By day, they’re accountants and stock brokers and insurance salesman. By night, they’re wild and crazy boys.”

Peter objected, “But I know plenty of gay people. None of them come to clubs like this, I’m sure.”

“Probably not,” Neal agreed, “just like most straight people aren’t part of the straight club scene. This is just a subset of the gay population that conforms to a popular stereotype.”

Peter threw an arm around Neal’s shoulders and laughed, “Well, I’m not that young anymore. Let’s go home.”

.

The next day, Peter and Neal were introduced as Peter Lassen and Nick Halden to the club manager, Richard Holmes. He was a fortyish trim blond man with a beard. He was dressed in neat preppy trousers and shirt. He shook hands with Peter and exchanged greetings. He glanced at his watch and concluded, “Well, I’m going to leave the details up to Michael. Gotta keep my star happy.”

Peter asked, “Do we need a contract or any employment forms?”

Rick winked, “Nah, this is all strictly off the books. Your boy will split tips with Michelle. It’s all cash. Plus he can have free drinks from the bar. Same for the waiters. They can keep their tips and have free drinks.”

Michael possessively took Neal’s arm and lead him backstage. Peter wandered over to the bar and sat down to drink a beer while he waited.

The costume designer and hairdresser was a trans woman named Renee with sleek red hair and pretty blue eyes. She fussed over Neal as she took his measurements and examined him closely. She gushed, “Oh, you’ll do just fine, honey! You’re a dream.”

Neal volunteered, “Michael said I’d probably be wearing a tux and maybe a top hat. I don’t think I will need much make up.”

Renee assured, “Oh, you just leave all that up to me. By the way, back here, we always refer to Michael as Michelle. It helps her stay in character.”

Neal was shown the props department and the system of ropes and pulleys that were used in the act to suspend Michelle from the ceiling or give the illusion of flying. After a little more orientation to the stage and the dressing rooms, Michael and Neal went back out to the bar and joined Peter.

Michael frowned, “I forgot to ask you what you want your stage name to be.”

Neal glanced at Peter and then volunteered, “George Devore?”

“Okay George,” Michael agreed. “I think I’ll call you Georgie. I need you backstage one hour before our first show.”

Neal questioned, “No rehearsal?” 

“No, we’ll just wing it and refine it as we go. You’ll just be there to compliment my act. You won’t have any solo numbers or anything. I’ll get a feel for what you can do as we work together.”

“Okay, then,” Neal said doubtfully. “I’ll Just follow your lead. See you tonight.”

Peter hesitated and asked, “I assume Neal will have some time to look around and see what’s going on. That’s why he is here, after all.”

“He will, and so will you. I’ll make sure of it,” Michael promised. “I’ll fill you in on the little bit I know and point out the people to keep an eye on. I believe the deal with the eggs is going down in the next couple of days.”

As they left, Peter teased, “Well, Georgie, ready for your debut tonight?”

Neal scowled, “Are you kidding? The things I do for the FBI!”

“Still better than prison,” Peter reminded him. “Look at it this way - no anklet. Of course, you’ll wear your fake Rolex watch.

.

When he arrived at the club that evening, Neal grabbed a Ketel One at the bar and drank it down before going backstage. He noticed at least two guys cruising him, but he just looked away. He was eagerly met by Renee who couldn’t wait to show him his costumes. Neal chuckled when he saw the rack of brightly colored tuxedos with matching hats and gloves. 

Renee hurried him into makeup and quickly applied foundation, lipstick and dramatic eyeliner with purple shadow. She fluffed and sprayed his hair since he would be taking the hat off at times. Michelle arrived already made up and dressed in a flowing lavender evening gown. Renee put the finishing touches on her elaborate hair style and sprayed it in place with a little glitter.

Michelle took Neal’s hand and said coquettishly, “Hi Georgie. My first number will be “I Feel Pretty.” First I will go onstage and run through my routine and then I will bring you out and introduce you. I need you to take my hand and walk around with me while I sing. We can try a couple twirls if you’re up to it.”

Neal asked for another drink while he dressed in the purple tux. Renee sent someone to get it and offered him a small bottles of poppers. She suggested, “These will help with your nerves and give you a little energy.”

As Neal dressed, he overheard two male dancers in scanty costumes discussing a drop to take place the next night. They had their backs to him so he couldn’t see who they were, but he distinctly heard their voices. One of them concluded, “Okay, we’re all set then. It better go smoothly.”

The other scoffed, “Why wouldn’t it? It always has before. It’s not like the cops hang out here.”

Neal heard them walk off and spoke quietly into his watch, “Could you hear that?”

Diana responded into his earbud, “Yeah, did you get a look at them? Can you identify them?”

“No, I couldn’t see their faces, but they were dancers,” Neal told her. “I’ll keep an eye out for them.”

Diana chuckled, “Hey, Neal? Break a leg out there, okay?”

Neal drained his drink and walked to his place in the wings to wait for his introduction. He hesitated a moment and then took a hit from the popper bottle. When Michelle gave him his cue, he straighten his hat and sauntered out onto the stage where Michelle took his arm and continued her stream of innuendos and jokes.

When his eyes adjusted to the stage lights, Neal looked out into the crowd and identified Diana and Jones. Michelle hissed at him, “Smile, honey!” and the music began. Neal gallantly escorted Michelle around the stage as she lip synched to a recording. At one point, he mounted a couple of steps to a platform and twirled Michelle around. Interspersed throughout the act were playful burlesque and slapstick moments.

As Neal relaxed, he had fun playing along. By the time the song ended, Neal was feeling good. There was enthusiastic applause and Michelle gave him his cue to get offstage by asking, “Georgie, honey, will you get me a drink? There’s a good boy. Isn’t he just the cutest? And he is all mine, so I’m warning you bitches to keep your hands off of him!”

Neal went to the bar and got himself another drink along with one for Michelle. Peter laid a hand on his arm and cautioned, “Easy there, buddy. Nice performance, by the way.”

Neal asked tersely, “Did you hear that conversation backstage earlier?”

Peter nodded, “Do you know which dancers they were?”

Neal shook his head, “No, they are all wearing the same silver briefs and from the back, they look alike. I’ll try to identify them by voice, if I get the chance.”

Michelle wound up her act and the techno music blared out again and men began dancing. Neal met Michelle backstage and she took her drink from him and then crisply critiqued his performance, “Not bad, but keep your posture rigid and remember you are on stage. You want to exaggerate your movements, and watch me to see where I’m leading you.”

She retired to her private dressing room. Renee offered Neal more poppers and asked if he wanted anything else. He declined and she told him, “Okay, you have an hour until we need you to get ready for the next show. Relax and enjoy your drink. Don’t get lost, ok?”

“I won’t,” Neal assured her. He left the hat in his dressing room and used the opportunity to poke around backstage. He realized he would have to catch the dancers during their break. He leaned up against a post and observed the activity around him. He saw the door to the manager’s office, but Rick was in there. Neal couldn’t get close enough to listen in, but he observed who came and went.

For the next show, Neal changed into a deep green suit which he assumed would compliment Michelle’s dress. He was feeling mellow and more confident so the second show went better than the first. Michelle, dressed in an emerald green slinky evening gown and a red wig, sang a campy version of “The Man I Love” while gazing soulfully at Neal. He even danced with her a bit.

Between shows, Neal watched for an opportunity to get into the manager’s office. He finally suggested that Peter try to get Rick out of his office on pretext of discussing Neal’s role in the show. He watched as Rick carefully locked the door to the space before he left.

Neal shed his costume and crept stealthily toward the office. He pulled out his lock pick tools and quickly gained entry to the office and closed the door behind him. He used a small flashlight to search the desk drawers, communicating with Jones and Diana as he went. Just as he was getting discouraged, he noticed a hidden panel in the desk. 

As he was about to slide it open, he heard noise outside the door. He peeked out the window and saw Peter frantically trying to keep Rick from entering the office. Neal quickly slipped into the private bathroom attached to the office and hid behind the door. He whispered into his watch, “Uh, time for the fire alarm.”

Jones surreptitiously lit a stack of napkins on fire and dropped them onto an empty table while Diana pulled the alarm. The deafening noise filled the club and the dance music stopped as people began to stampede toward the exit.

Neal quickly took the opportunity to slip out of Rick’s office. When he saw the frantic scene in the club, he walked onto the stage, turned on the microphone and calmly announced, “No need to panic. The fire is under control. Everyone just calm down.”

His words had the desired effect and Neal signaled the technicians to restart the music. He hurried to his dressing room to get into his next costume, a bright blue tuxedo and bowler hat. Peter informed him through the earbuds, “Neal, I had to tell Rick that you wanted to sing. Can you and Michael come up with something quick?”

Neal found Michelle and quickly filled her in. She frowned and asked, “Do you know ‘One For The Road?’”

Neal nodded and quickly went to get another drink to give him courage. When he returned, Michelle was dressed in a glittery powder blue dress. She went on stage and after her usual suggestive jokes, she asked the audience, “Who wants to hear Georgie sing with me?”

The crowd had recovered from the fire scare and they applauded enthusiastically. Neal strode out onto the stage and draped an arm around Michelle. The music began and they mouthed the words, “Set ‘em up, Joe.” They proceded smoothly through the song, ending with harmonizing, “Make it one for my baby and one more for the road, the long, long road.”

Michelle hugged Neal and told him, “That was pretty good, sweetie. I just hope you found something in Rick’s office that made it worth the risk.”

Neal kissed her cheek and replied, “I just might have.”

.

Peter came backstage and collected Neal, who was coming down from the adrenaline rush. He had a drink in his hand and and he greeted Peter with a big hug. Peter asked, “Hey, how many of those have you had, buddy?

Neal grinned and slurred, “I don’ know. Someone keeps leavin’ them in my dressin’ room.”

Peter looked at him critically and noticed that he had missed a button on his shirt. He took the glass away from Neal and said firmly, “Well, I think you’ve had enough.”

Neal leaned against him and they headed for the door. Neal waved cheerfully at Renee, who was removing Michelle’s heavy make up, and called, “See ya tomorrow!”

When they got outside, Neal began singing “One For The Road.” Peter noticed Neal’s flushed face and glazed eyes. He felt for Neal’s pulse and found it beating hard and fast. He worried, “Neal, remember what you told me about unattended drinks?”

Neal giggled, “Yeah, why? Did someone put somethin’ in your drink? Peter, are you high?”

Peter sighed, “No, but you are. We’d better go back and ask Michael what it might be.”

Neal asked, “You mean Michelle? You know she doesn’t like to be called ‘he’ when she’s in costume.”

“Well, she’s not in costume now,” Peter noted, as Michael walked toward them.

“Oh, then you should call him ‘he’,” Neal advised unnecessarily. “See, when he looks like a man, you call him ‘he’ and when he looks like a woman, you call him ‘she’.”

“I got it, Neal,” Peter said irritably. “Now let’s see if he can give us a clue as to what was in your drink.”

“It was vodka,” Neal informed him blithely.

Peter ignored him and approached Michael. He explained that he was pretty sure something had been added to Neal’s drink to make him high. Michael smiled at Neal and informed them, “It was probably GHB. How much did he drink? A small dose won’t hurt him.”

Peter was alarmed. “I don’t know. Should I take him to an emergency room?”

“No, I doubt if that’s necessary,” Michael assured, “but you shouldn’t leave him alone. Of course, if he starts to have trouble breathing or passes out, you should get help for him. He may get nauseated and puke, too.”

“Oooh, gross,” Neal chimed in. “Don’ worry. I feel fine.”

Michael worried, “I hope he’ll be okay by tomorrow night. He said he might have found something in Rick’s office and he seems to think something is going down tomorrow night. I could give him speed if he needs it to get through the show.”

Peter winced, “No, I don’t think that will be necessary. When will it be safe to let him sleep?”

“Oh, he can sleep. You just need to monitor him to be sure he doesn’t stop breathing,” Michael explained.

“So he can sleep, but I can’t. Great,” muttered Peter. “Okay, we’ll see you tomorrow night. I sure hope we can wrap this case up.”

“Just be sure no one knows I called you in,” warned Michael warily.

Peter put Neal in the car and drove him to his home in Brooklyn with Neal chattering the whole time. When they got there, Neal noticed, “Oh, Peter, you forgot to drop me off.”

“Nope,” Peter smiled. “You’re staying with Elizabeth and me tonight. Come on in.”

.

Elizabeth met them at the door and Peter explained what was going on. He left Neal with her while he went upstairs to change into sweats and find some for Neal. He could hear Elizabeth laughing as Neal entertained her with stories about the club.

When he came back downstairs, El asked, “Did you guys really set off the fire alarm? That must have caused a riot.”

Peter observed, “Actually, Neal handled the situation very calmly. It must have been after that that his drink was drugged.”

Neal grinned, “Hey, I feel fine! Did you hear me singin’, Peter. ‘Set ‘em up, Joe’....”

“Yeah, yeah, well, you were lip syncing, but yeah, you did a good job,” Peter agreed. “I had to tell Rick you wanted to sing so I would have some reason to talk to him while you checked out his office.”

“Well, he almos’ caught me. You didn’ keep him long enough,” complained Neal.

Peter turned on some soothing music and sighed, “Come on, buddy. Sit down and relax. You need to get some rest before you have to go back tomorrow night.”

Peter sank onto the sofa and Neal sat down right next to him and rested his head on Peter’s shoulder. He said dreamily, “It’s not as bad as I thought it would be. Actually it was kind of fun. Lots of guys tried to hit on me. Did they hit on you, too?”

Peter chuckled, “I had to remove some roving hands, too.”

Elizabeth brought them some hot tea and questioned, “I hope you weren’t tempted, Peter. All those young studs....”

“They can’t compare to you, hon,” Peter soothed, “and anyway they’re not my type.”

“Am I your type?” Neal teased. He pressed closer to Peter and stroked his leg.

Elizabeth laughed and announced, “I’m going to bed. You two behave yourselves.”

When she was gone, Peter began stripping Neal of his clothes so he could put on the extra pair of sweats he found for him. Neal giggled, “You do like me, don’t you?”

Peter muttered, “Oh, shut up. I’m just getting you ready for bed.”

“Bed, Peter?” Neal gushed. “Oh, I never thought you cared for me that way.”

“I don’t,” stammered Peter, “not that way. Oh, come on, let’s get these sweats on you.”

Neal resisted, “No, too hot.” He leaned up and kissed Peter on his lips. “See how hot I am?”

Peter took a deep breath. He left Neal’s shirt off and lay down on the sofa. He pulled Neal down beside him so he was half on top of him and murmured, “See? Isn’t that comfy?”

Neal nestled against him and Peter could feel Neal’s erection pressing against his leg. He stroked Neal’s back and soothed, “There, just calm down now. Take some deep breaths and relax.”

Neal stretched luxuriously and then he started to talk. He began, “You know, Peter, there are things you don’ know about me. Lots of things, really.”

“Well, now is not a good time for you to tell me,” Peter cautioned.

“Oh, but I want to. I want you to know,” Neal persisted. “When I first came to New York, before I ever met Kate, or even Mozzie....”

Peter interrupted, “Really, Neal, I don’t think you should go on. Maybe some other time.”

Neal insisted, “No, it’s important, because of this case and my part in it.”

Peter was curious. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“Well, you see, when I first came to New York, I was gay,” Neal said unexpectedly. “I mean I thought I was. I had sex with men. Lots of men. And I liked it. I went to gay bars and clubs and picked up tricks. I was very young so I was desirable to a lot of guys.”

Peter was stunned. “N-Neal, What are you talking about? Do you mean you had sex for money?”

Neal giggled, “Not very often. I mean I had sex often, but I usually didn’ get paid. I admit I let guys buy me drinks or dinner or give me presents, though. You know I hardly had any money. Pickpocketing and card tricks only gets you so far.”

“Neal, please tell me you were safe. You always used condoms, didn’t you?” Peter hoped.

“Oh yeah, I was careful and I’ve always been HIV negative and I still am,” Neal assured him.

Peter stammered, “B-but K-Kate and Alex and.... How can you be gay? Does Mozzie know?”

Neal teased, “How do you think I got to know Vincent? He’s gayer than I am. He had quite a thing for me. He bought me a lot of nice things and taught me about society and art and money and a lot of stuff. I think he loved me. Maybe that’s why he was so angry when I betrayed him.”

“How did he feel about your infatuation with Kate?” Peter asked.

“Infatuation? Peter! That was real love! You know how much I loved Kate,” Neal chided. “Of course, she knew about me and Vincent, but I promised to give all that up for her and I did.”

Peter rubbed his face in disbelief. “But if you’re gay, how can you be attracted to women? You flirt with every female you run into.”

Neal grinned, “And some of the men, too. Peter, haven’t you ever heard of bisexual? Or pansexual?”

“I can’t believe this. What does Mozzie think about it? Did he force you into having sex with Adler?” Peter asked.

“Of course not!” Neal denied vehemently. “I didn’t need to be forced. I wanted to. You know Mozzie. He accepts people as they are. And he saw my relationship with Vincent as an opportunity for a long con.”

“I’m sure he did,” Peter said bitterly. “But Neal, he used you. So Kate and Mozzie knew. Who else? Alex? Does she know?”

“Yeah, she knows,” Neal conceded. “I didn’t used to keep it a secret. In prison, being gay can work either way. If you admit to being a fag, guys are brutal; but on the other hand, it makes the sex less repulsive.”

“Neal. I can’t believe all this,” Peter admitted. “So are you trying to tell me that this case has awakened your gay feelings?”

“They were never asleep!” Neal giggled. “I’m just saying, I’m more comfortable there than you might think.”

“Really? Then why have you never told me this before?” Peter wondered. “You let Michael think you were straight. You haven’t told anyone else at the FBI this, have you?”

Neal disclosed, “No, but I think Diana might suspect. At least, I bet she wouldn’t be surprised.”

“But why have you kept it a secret?” Peter quizzed. “Are you ashamed?”

Neal denied, “No, Peter. It’s just, well, it’s just easier to be straight and it isn’t anyone else’s business.”

Peter persisted, “But why are you telling me now?”

Neal shrugged, “I don’t know. I’m high and I thought you might have noticed my hard on when I lay down on you.”

Peter resisted, “Don’t tell me you’re attracted to me, Neal.”

“Don’t tell me you didn’t know that? How could you not know that?” Neal chuckled.

“Well, obviously, you know I’m straight, and I’m very happily married,” Peter protested.

“Of course,” Neal agreed. “I could give you a great blow job, though, if you’d let me.”

Peter sat straight up and moved away from Neal. “No! Just no, Neal! Get that idea out of your mind,”

Neal pushed him back down and hugged him tight, saying, “Hey, it’s okay. We’re just friends, okay? Just like we always have been.”

Peter relaxed and sighed, “Yeah, okay. You know we need to get some sleep. We’ve got some smugglers to catch tomorrow.”

Neal agreed lazily, “Yeah. But if you ever change your mind, just let me know.”

Peter growled, “Neal....”

“What?” Neal asked innocently. “Let’s get some sleep. I’m not going to stop breathing, I promise.”

Peter wriggled out from under Neal and suggested, “Then let’s go upstairs and sleep in beds. We’ll feel a lot better in the morning that way.”

.

Peter woke up about 9:00 am to find Elizabeth gone and Neal still sound asleep. He had only gotten a couple of hours sleep, but he didn’t feel like going back to bed. He went downstairs and fixed a cup of strong coffee and mulled over everything Neal had told him the night before. He shook his head in disbelief. Yet he was sure that Neal had been telling the truth.

After a while, Peter heard Neal stirring around upstairs. He winced as he heard Neal moaning and then vomiting, but he hesitated to go to him. He didn’t want Neal to feel embarrassed.

Neal finally stumbled down the stairs about noon, yawning and looking for coffee. He gave Peter a swift kiss on the cheek and teased, “Hi honey. Was last night as good for you as it was for me?”

Peter warned, “Neal, stop that. I didn’t get as much sleep as you did.”

Neal pointed out, “You didn’t wake up with a killer headache and you didn’t just puke your guts up like I did.”

Peter asked solicitously, “Do you feel better now? Can I get you anything? Coffee might not be such a good idea.”

Neal declined, “I already took some Advil I found upstairs, and I do need coffee now.”

Peter poured the coffee and handed it to Neal without looking at him. Neal studied him closely and said, “Let me guess. You’re freaking out about what I told you last night.”

“I’m surprised you remember,” Peter muttered. “Well, you have to admit, it’s a lot to process.”

“Is it?” Neal shrugged, “Then don’t. Just forget about it.”

“I can’t do that. How am I supposed to do that?” Peter protested. “I can’t just forget it.”

Neal looked at him seriously, “Please, Peter. Don’t make me regret telling you. I need you to have my back at the club tonight.”

Peter smiled warmly, “You can always count on that, buddy.”

They spent the afternoon plotting how to catch Rick in the act of selling the Faberge eggs. Neal concluded, “I’m sure they are going to be in that secret compartment of Rick’s desk. I just need an opportunity to get in there.”

Peter queried, “What do you suggest?”

Neal suggested, “After the first show, Diana and Jones can create some kind of disturbance out in the main room of the club, maybe a fight or something. When Rick goes to handle the incident, you and I can slip into his office. If anyone sees us, we’ll pretend we are having a private intimate moment.”

Peter nodded, “Okay, that might work. At least that way, I’ll be there to protect you if anything happens.”

Neal flirted, “You do say the sweetest things!”

Peter swatted at him and ordered, “Get out of here. Go home and get ready for tonight. I’ll pick you up at 8:30.”

.

Neal was careful to get his own drinks from the bar that evening and guarded them carefully. Unfortunately, shortly before the first show, one of the dancers bumped up against him and splashed his drink onto Neal’s bright yellow tux. Renee hurried over and urged Neal to take it off right away. 

Michelle came into Neal’s dressing room and asked, “How adventurous do you feel tonight, George.”

Neal smiled, “What do you have in mind? I’m game.”

Michelle suggested, “How about singing a duet with me? I’ve been dying to try it.”

Neal wondered, “What would we sing?”

“Have you ever seen the movie White Christmas, honey?” Michelle asked coyly.

She rushed him to Renee for make up and a wig and then they found a flattering dress for him. When Michelle went onstage and announced that she would be joined by Georgette for her next number, the audience clapped enthusiastically.

Neal met her on stage and they launched into a lusty version of “Sisters.” When Neal sang, “Lord help the Mister who comes between me and my sister” and Michelle finished with, “And Lord help the sister who comes between me and my man,” the audience applauded wildly. 

After several bows, Neal hurried off stage to get his gown off and slipped into his black slacks and tank top. He heard Rick curse loudly as he was summoned to deal with a situation out in the club.

Neal quietly slipped around the corner to Rick’s office where he found Peter waiting for him. He quickly picked the lock and ducked under the desk to access the hidden compartment. With a little manipulation, he was able to open it up.

Neal gasped, “Peter, they’re here! Five Faberge eggs in a carrying case. They’re gorgeous.”

Peter warned, “Quick Neal! I hear someone coming. Neal slid the panel closed and pulled on Peter’s ankles so he sat down hard on the desk chair. Neal quickly unfastened Peter’s pants and took his cock in his mouth as he heard the door open.

Rick exclaimed, “What the fuck do you two think you are doing? How did you even get in here? Wasn’t the door locked?”

Peter put a hand on Neal’s head and groaned. He turned to Rick and snapped, “Well, the door wasn’t locked. Can’t you see what we’re doing?”

Rick sputtered, “Five minutes! Pull yourselves together and get the fuck out of my office! And don’t ever try this again!”

Neal continued to suck enthusiastically on Peter’s hardening cock and the combination of fear and excitement and a clever tongue quickly caused Peter to come into Neal’s hot mouth. Neal swallowed and licked his lips and grinned as he refastened Peter’s pants. Peter blushed and mumbled, “Just shut up. We’ll never mention this again!”

Neal put his finger to his lips and listened to the voices outside the door of the office. He heard one of the dancers saying to Rick, “What the fuck? It has to be tonight. I've got the buyer waiting in the back room.”

Rick placated, “Okay, okay, it will just be a minute. Come on, I’ll get you a drink. Then I’ll get the merchandise for you.”

Neal reached into the hidden compartment and removed a gun before refastening the case He winked at Peter and explained, “Insurance.” Peter slipped it into his jacket pocket and the two of them exited the office as soon as Rick was out of sight.

.

Neal hurriedly dressed in a shiny black satin tux for the next show. He could hear Peter planning their takedown with Jones and Diana through his earbud. Suddenly he heard two men arguing loudly in the compartment next to his. He recognized the voices of the dancers that he had heard the night before.

The first one said, “I’m telling you something is wrong. I think it has to do with that new guy, George.”

The other man brushed him off, “That nelly queen? You can’t be serious. Anyway, Renee says he’s okay.”

Neal took a quick look and recognized the dancers. He quietly left his dressing room and headed to the bar. He whispered into his watch, “Did you catch that, Peter? Those are the same two dancers as last night.”

Peter responded, “Did you get a look at them?”

Neal replied, “Yep, they’re called Brett and Trent. No idea what their last names are. Those probably aren’t their real names anyway.”

“Just stay cool, Neal. If Renee is involved we’ll soon find out. Just go on with your show” Peter advised.

Michelle met up with Neal and informed him, “I’m doing a medley of Supremes’ songs. You’ll just escort me and we’ll dance and fool around some. Stay with me.”

Neal nodded and let her know, “We’re pretty sure something may be going down tonight, but all the action should be backstage.”

Michelle exclaimed, “I certainly hope so!”

Neal offered his arm to her and they glided onto the stage together. Michelle introduced him as Georgie once again and bantered with the crowd. When she was ready, she dramatically sang, “Stop! In The Name Of Love!”

Neal played along with her and they danced as she switched to, “Baby Love.” He was keeping one eye on Brett and Trent so he noticed when they were replaced by substitutes. He managed to get his wrist near enough to his face to warn Peter that they were coming backstage.

Michelle began singing “You Can’t Hurry Love” and slipped a bottle of poppers to him. She whispered urgently, “Keep up, George! Pay attention!”

Neal forced himself to focus on Michelle and the show as she sang, “I Got Him Back In My Arms Again” and dramatically hugged Neal against her. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Renee standing in the wings with a gun in her hand.

Neal quickly surprised Michelle by swinging her around so he was between them. He ordered, “Quick! Get off the stage! Go down into the audience and blend in.”

Michelle looked terrified, but she did as Neal told her as the music ended. Neal smoothly moved to one side of the stage and alerted the team through his watch that Renee was armed. 

As the dance music resumed in the club, Neal heard the sounds of a skirmish backstage and he noticed Rick heading toward the room at the back of the club. He called out to Peter to get his attention and Renee aimed the gun at him.

Neal quickly grabbed one of the ropes beside the stage and scaled up it to get out of the line of fire. He dropped his top hat onto the stage and Renee shot at it. Peter and Jones were both backstage and called out, “Shot fired!”

They had Renee’s exit cut off so she ran out onto the stage. She turned and aimed shakily at Peter. Neal quickly swung the rope in her direction and slid down it to knock Renee to the floor. Jones rushed forward to disarm her. Peter came over and slapped handcuffs on her and began reading her rights,

Neal shouted, “Jones! Brett and Trent are getting away! Look over there!”

Jones jumped off the stage and ran after them, catching them before they got out the door. Across the room, Diana apprehended Rick. Neal raced over and recovered the case containing the Faberge eggs.

Rick cursed at him, “Goddamn fag! What do you think you are doing?””

Diana quickly snapped cuffs on him and escorted him out. Neal located Michelle, who was extremely distressed. He reassured her, “Hey, it’s okay. We got them. Your hunch was right.”

Michelle sobbed, “But Renee! I trusted her! Was she going to shoot me?”

Neal comforted, “I don’t think you were her target. I just wanted to get you out of the danger zone.”

Michelle dried her eyes and looked around in disbelief. “Look at these bitches! Most of them don’t even know anything happened! If they noticed anything, they thought it just was part of the show.”

Neal chuckled, “Well, they will know in a minute because this club is about to be closed.”

He saw back up agents streaming in through the doors. The blaring music stopped and Peter took the microphone. He announced, “The Gay Times is closed as of now. Everyone please leave in an orderly fashion and no one will get hurt.”

FBI agents supervised the exit of the crowd, including those too high to understand what was going on. Finally, they swept the back room and collected the last of the stragglers, interrupting a few couples still involved in sex in spite of all the confusion.

.

Peter and Neal met with Michelle backstage after Jones and Diana accompanied their prisoners back to the FBI for interrogation. While Peter talked to Michelle, Neal changed his clothes and explored Rick’s office for more clues.

Peter called to him, “That’s enough for tonight, buddy. We’ll get ERT in here tomorrow for a thorough search.”

“Tomorrow, Peter?” teased Neal. “Do you know it’s 2:00 in the morning?”

Michelle dramatically thanked Neal again for saving her and then observed, “I guess the club will probably be closed for a while now, but if you ever need a job, just call me anytime. You have a lot of potential as a performer, even if you did upstage me, and I would certainly feel safer with you around.”

Neal kissed her cheek and then he and Peter waited while Michelle changed back into Michael so they could give him a ride to their office to get his official statement. Peter thanked him for the tip and showed him the fabulous famous eggs they had recovered.

Michael worried, “Nobody has to know it was me who gave you the tip, do they? I’ll never work again if I’m known as a snitch.”

They reassured him they wouldn’t tell his secret. When they were alone in his office, Peter cleared his throat and said uncomfortably, “Um, Neal, uh, about tonight, you did a really good job.”

Neal smirked, “Which job was that, Peter?”

Peter blushed bright red and warned, “Neal....”

Neal reassured him, “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”

Peter concluded fondly, “And yours is safe with me.”

As he started to leave, Neal turned back and pulled a couple of blue tablets out of his pocket. He said hesitantly, “Hey Peter? Look what Renee gave me... It’s Ecstasy. Wanna try it?”

Peter chided, “Neal, throw those away!”

Neal reluctantly stuffed the pills back into his pocket.

Peter relented, “Okay, save them for a special occasion then.”

Neal winked and grinned, “Like your next blow job?”

He hurried away as he heard an outraged Peter exclaim, “Neal!!!”

**Author's Note:**

> White Collar characters were created by Jeff Eastin for the series on USA TV.


End file.
